A friend of mine was just talking to me. It was about depression and how a friend of his doesn’t want to get professional help.
Having been depressed for the vast majority of my life I can give a few thoughts here.
Getting professional help is scary:
- It makes it official that you have a problem.
- It puts a permanent mark in your file with health officials.
- It labels you as a “crazy person”
- You might not be the person that talks to strangers.
- It looks weak.
- It feels strange.
- It is very exhausting to talk through your problems.
Getting help is not a sign of weakness. It is a sign of great strength to address and fix your mental problems.
For me personally it was quite a journey. I went to therapy for a while but it didn’t help me at all. I am the type of person that wants to fix their problems themselves. I am not happy to sit in a room with a stranger and tell them my story and have them tell me stuff like “you know, you can’t change it anymore, it’s in the past.” blabla roll eyes. Right? I get that feeling. I knew the things the therapist said to me back then. I went through that phase of “I can’t change the past” long before I went to therapy.
What helped me was time, meditation, and writing. Those were my main factors in healing. And how long did it take? Well about 6 years. Yes. It took about 6 years for me, to fix my issues, to get back on track. The 12 years of depression before that could of course not be fixed over night. I had good reasons to be depressed and it just took time. But:
the things I recommend for people who do not want to go to therapy:
- Practice to focus on one thing and one thing alone. Learn to turn everything else off in your mind and to focus on one thing.
- Meditation. It’s probably the advanced way of focusing. With the right meditation techniques you can work on a lot of your problems.
- Writing helps to release things that you want to say but you have no one you could say it to. You can even delete it when you feel better.
- Writing letters. If you have been hurt or a person has caused you deep pain or trauma, it helps to write them a letter that you will never send. Just write it, and let it all out.
- Hobbies help as well. For me it was music. Other people might have different hobbies, just do what you like to proof to yourself that there are enjoyable things on this planet.
- Talk to people. Even if it is not face to face. Maybe you find a forum or an internet friend. Getting some feedback helps to put things into perspective and to see things from a different angle.
These things above helped me greatly and, without trying to sound dramatic, saved my live. Try it.
If you have no one to talk to, and you really need someone to listen or read your story, as part of your healing process / If you simply want to exchange etc, feel free to send me a message. I will read, I will not judge, and I will answer! clos3rlook<at>gmail<dot>com
Be well and love yourself. Live is so much more!